Elio’s got bars.
Photo: The Graham Norton Show/Youtube
Timothee Chalamet just won’t let us rest. Whether he’s making sweet love to A Peach or unknowingly wearing a bedazzled harness to the Golden Globes, he’s always got at least one trick up his sleeve to drive me to day dreaming and scribbling Mrs. Mariah Chalamet onto the nearest material I can find. Today was no different.
While appearing on The Graham Norton Show last night in London, England, the star of my heart and Beautiful Boy, was confronted with a memory from his past. As a high school student, at the prestigious LaGuardia High School for Music & Art and Performing Arts in Manhattan, Timothee — just an ordinary student getting an education alongside Ansel Elgort and other future stars — had to take Statistics. To combine his raw talent and his coursework, young Timothee decided to do something different for his statistics class project. While his classmates bored their peers with “parabolas, and things that were more appropriate for statistics,” Timothee decided to share a pre-recorded rap. Using the name “Lil’ Timmy Tim,” a rap persona that he already had, Timothee blessed his class with some bars. “I did it with a friend on a green screen in school, and I was gonna Photoshop my teacher’s face in, but I got too lazy, so now … I’m pointing around and there’s nothing,” he told Norton on the show.
In the video Lil Timmy Tim begins with “Statistics, yo! Statistics, yo!” and goes on to speak about the probability (a statistics term!) of seeing him on TV. Wearing a tight grey v-neck shirt, equally tight light washed jeans, and a backwards baseball cap, Lil Timmy Tim looks like a more talented version of DJ James Kennedy, or as he likes to call himself: White Kanye West.
Lil Timmy Tim received a failing grade for his work. His statistics, yo, teacher awarded him a D, which Timothee believes was too generous. Thank you Timothee and Lil Timmy Tim for continuing to be a shining light. I assure you that there’s a high probability I’ll watch this video many, many times in the future.